It's the End of the World!

I guess there isn't enough happening in the world today. That is evident by the press and attention that is being given to a group who has been warning that May 21st is Judgement Day.

Some are such strong believers that they will be sitting holding their breath tomorrow waiting for the events of the day to unfold. Okay. Whatever.

As another blogger reminded today, the man who "started" this whole campaign to warn others of doomsday had predicted this happening years ago but nothing happened. I guess his supporters have either forgiven him for that alarm or they have some other way to justify that "this time" he is right.

I don't have any great plans this weekend. It is rare that I do. I am just looking forward to chilling with my daughter and being spontaneous. I expect to wake up Sunday morning and if the mood strikes me, make up some homemade blueberry Belgian waffles and just enjoy the day with my family.

I am pretty sure that on Sunday there will be a bunch of people walking around feeling like fools for their beliefs. What do you think?

Mother's Day

I was a difficult child to raise. Maybe it is easy for me to admit now because karma has come to bite me in the ass. Whatever.

Even before karma decided to pay me back I knew the truth. I own who I was. Rebellious and misunderstood. I am not going to place blame. Parents are people and we all make mistakes. Honestly we can only do what we think is the best thing to do at the time.

Sometimes we screw up. Sometimes we see that and sometimes we never do.

I had to make adult choices way before I was ready to. The one thing that I am sure of in my heart is that I had the best intentions.

It may be easy for someone to judge the choices I have made but until you are faced with a similar decision you cannot possibly relate. Even if you did have the same choices to make; you didn't really. Everyone's life is unique because we are all unique.

Mothers are expected to be perfect. Guess what kids, we aren't. Not to sound like a wise old woman but until you are faced with raising your own kids you just can't get it. You don't understand. You can't.

From the moment I first found out that a life was growing inside of me, one that I alone would be responsible for, my life changed. That was more than 30 years ago. Fear was the biggest emotion I felt. I was alone and had no idea what was going to happen to me or the baby that was growing inside of me.

Many thoughts went through my head but all I was sure of was that I was going to become a mother. I had no idea how my teenage life would change. I had no clue what the future held for me.

Looking back now, I remember how it felt. I was scared. Although several of my friends became teen moms I never thought it could happen to me. Again, I lacked the maturity and recklessness was a way of life.

Although I had to grow up quickly and sometimes felt lost along the way, I wouldn't change a thing.

I was blessed with a beautiful daughter and although she cannot understand the reality of the sacrifices that I have made for her (and her siblings) along the way, it is okay. She may never understand it all.

That is until she becomes a mother herself. Until then, the blame for everything that has gone wrong in her life will be my fault.

Sometimes mothers are the targets for their young adult children's own failings.

One day she will own up to her own responsibility for what she doesn't like about her life. And when she is ready...she knows where I will be.

Standing by Family

When your adult child disappoints you by making choices that are wrong for them, do you stand by biting your tongue or do you voice your opinion?

Nothing in life is black and white-there are always shades of gray in between.


In a family, there are the gossipers who will appear to be supportive but bash you behind your back. There are the rebels who stand up for what they believe even if it goes against what the family stands for.

In a family where there is dysfunction , many continue the cycle partly out of ignorance and partly because they lack the strength or courage to fight against it.

Being a supportive family member can be tough when you see a younger family member choose to do something that is so wrong and is only going to lead to heartache. It is easy to see a situation clearer when you are not living it. You may be making the wrong assumptions about it, but then again, sometimes you are not.

When a family member is insistent that you go along with supporting someone's bad choice and you refuse, it can lead to family resentment and arguments. All this because one person is making a bad choice that few will confront them about.

I believe in honesty. Honesty can be painful but if it is approached in a loving way, it can soften the blow. The problem is that too many people are too willing to put up with the bad behavior of others in order to stay in their good favor. This makes for phoney relationships. For some people, they will accept anything that they can get. Even from their family.

Perhaps it comes from an inability to look in the mirror and be honest with our own faults. It takes courage to admit that the "perfect" life you dreamed of was a fantasy. For all the control you asserted onto someone, ultimately, you find out that once the person was allowed to be free you lost that control.

"Catholic school girl" syndrome is when a girl who has been controlled by the strictness of religion, rules and her environment breaks free and discovers all that was forbidden to her. Some will explore, experiment and then move on. Others will get sucked into a life where they make bad choices that will affect them for a long time to come.

The young adult thinks they are having the time of their life and is so naive that they cannot see how wrong they are. They are being mislead, used and family cannot get through to them. Sometimes family members won't even try. There isn't much that a family can do.

It is a lesson in how not to parent but for the young adult who is making these life choices that will surely bring heartache, it is sad. There is no "fixing" them now...they are going to make their wrong choices and have to live with it.

Just because the person is "family" doesn't mean that you have to support their poor decision.